Avengers Grimm (2015)

Action, Adventure, Fantasy
Casper Van Dien, Lauren Parkinson, Lou Ferrigno, Milynn Sarley
When Rumpelstiltskin destroys the Magic Mirror and escapes to the modern world, the four princesses of "Once Upon a Time"-Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, and Rapunzel-are sucked ...
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  • 14 Apr 2015 Released:
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I didn't last 30 minutes.5/10
Why isn't there a negative scoring system? 1 (Awful) is being kind.

There is a 10 paragraph review in here on this film and I couldn't keep a straight face whilst reading it. Let this be a lesson; Trying to ride on the backs of multimillion dollar movies with a budget of $25 is not advised, even if you do have the opportunity to hire 5 MILFS and a couple of actors ready to shame themselves due to owing a backlog of rent. I suppose one shouldn't blame the actors, we all have to eat. I suggest to them a change in Agents.

I would rather wait for eternity for the right script and never see it than enter into a project that would of stunk on paper as bad as this surely would of.

This film was made as a tax write off, Right? .. Right? I believe I probably watched it a little longer than most, right up until Snow White demanded the others "Get In The Car!" at which point I watched the rest in fast forward skip mode.

To painful for words. Do yourself a favor and stick to the original fairy tales & marvel Comics that this modern pooper derived from.
Great premise, definitely needed some touching up6/10
This mash-up of Once Upon a Time and The Avengers definitely played out like a movie that wanted to go somewhere, but didn't quite have the oomph to pull it off. All the actors suffered to a degree, attempting to squeeze out lines that might work whilst working with a director who clearly didn't care about performance quality enough to do a whole lot of retakes.

Iron John (Lou Ferringo) was an excellent addition to this film's mythos, though his arc was a tad rushed. The princesses are tolerable for their roles, but again, could have used some better acting coaching. Red easily steals the show.

The girls say each other's names so seldom, it can be easy to forget that the purple-haired one is Cinderella - or even why she has purple hair. By far, the most effort appears to have been put into Rumpelstiltskin as the villain. As a dime store Loki, he chews up every scene he's in and does it with class.

Sadly, most of the other characters are quite forgettable. And the logistics of how the princesses would survive in our world are barely even mentioned outside of clothing choices.

If you can tolerate some of the movie's shortcomings, however, it has a lot of great nods to the properties it shamelessly rips off. Some have complained that it depends too much on the "babes" being "hot" to sell its point, but I'd say it manages without that. Outside Red, I personally had difficulty seeing how any of them were treated as sex objects. Or if they were supposed to be that, even Rumpelstiltskin's secretary did a better job at it. Making Rapunzel a redhead instead of a blonde also struck me as an odd choice.

This movie definitely wanted to be something. And if your standards aren't astronomically high, it will succeed. Just don't count on this measuring up to any of Marvel's Avengers films any time soon.
Hard to find a bright spot4/10
I don't give bad votes to small publishers, much as I would like to occasionally. This would be such an occasion. These guys gotta eat, live and learn you know. Red Riding Hood (Elizabeth Peterson) and Lou Ferrigno! give a good performance. Set design is pretty good. Just about everything else is straight out of the 1980's day time television as far as sophistication of the script and special effects. The plot was derailed by the script and wooden lines.

I suspect this was a good learning experience for everyone involved in the production and I look forward to seeing more. Really, they aren't more than a mile or two from "campy" or fun.

It could make a good series (spoiler?). Despite the above I think if they get some outside help they could become a group with decent Saturday entertainment value. The vision is blurry.. but best of luck!
Waste of time, money.... Not talent!2/10
When Rumpelstiltskin destroys the Magic Mirror and escapes to the modern world, the four princesses of Once Upon a Time—Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, and Rapunzel—are sucked through the portal too. Well-trained and endowed with magical powers, they must fight Rumpelstiltskin and his army of thralls before he enslaves everyone on earth

It could lead to a good story... But it didn't. The acting is hurtful and embarrassing, the plot ridiculous and even the fighting scenes are horrendous. So if you've got time to spare watch something else. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED!
Why did they make this?1/10
Yes.. it has the word Avengers in it. It has supposed fairytale princesses in it but in reality, it's a shallow babefest. The acting is abysmal, it was nice seeing Lou Ferrigno acting again though. There's guns.. some sort of slovenly attempt at a plot which really started off slow and just meandered around and didn't really keep my attention. I did finish it though, although a part of me wishes i hadn't. The princesses are very action oriented and throw around amazing magical powers but do little more than spew horrid lines and look attractive. There was a little money put into the film for the effects budget, i'll give it that.