Muck (2015)

Horror
Kane Hodder, Bryce Draper, Lachlan Buchanan, Jaclyn Swedberg
After narrowly escaping an ancient burial ground, a group of friends find themselves trapped between two evils, forcing them to fight, die, or go back the way they came.
  • Anchor Bay Company:
  • N/A Rated:
  • IMDB link IMDB:
  • 13 Mar 2015 Released:
  • 17 Mar 2015 DVD Release:
  • N/A Box office:

Trailer:

Muck is an appropriate title.2/10
Muck is a lot of things... poorly lit... lacking plot... full of character dialogue that's trying way too hard to be Whedonesque... a shameless means to show various women naked.

The one thing Muck is not is a good movie. In fact, it's barely a movie.

We are thrown into a story mid-way with a cast of characters we get no introduction to. What little dialogue they have before they get killed doesn't do much to endear us to them, so why care about them being killed? Instead of characterization and backstory, Muck gives you extended scenes of a woman showering and a woman who apparently keeps a Victoria's Secret inventory in her purse putting on a one woman lingerie fashion show in a dive bar bathroom.

But wait, the movie has Kane Hodder! Surely that must give it some cred, right? Not as such. Kane Hodder as Hatchet under a ton of make up? Scary. Kane Hodder under a hockey mask? Scary? A shirtless, aging Kane Hodder splashing around having what is essentially a wrestling match in the climax of the movie? Not so scary. Kind of sad actually.

Muck wants to be Cabin in the Woods, but it's not funny or invention enough. Muck wants to be a softcore porn, but the movie's lighting is so bad you are better off watching scrambled porn channels. Muck wants to be a horror movie gorefest, but most of the kills happen JUST off camera and we're shown, instead, the killer or a nearby witness just getting karo syrup tossed on them.

Muck wants to be a movie but it isn't. If the excuse is "Well, it's the middle part of a trilogy released first," then that shows the director/writer/guy who clearly likes boobs had no original idea other than "Let's just show the movies out of order to confuse people."
The writer wanted to hire girls to get their boobs out for him1/10
What the... I have no words.

So lemme get this straight. You're 2 best friends were killed, you run for help, you decide hey - there's a bar, and there's a hot girl right there.. let's have a shot, and hey, I'm just gonna wash my face whilst I'm here because it's not like anyone is in any immediate danger of being savaged to death whilst they wait for me to save them. And the nudity... well my Husband loves a bit of T&A in a film (he's a guy,duh!) but even he couldn't understand why every girl in the move was flashing her silicones when they should perhaps be concentrating on , um I don't know..survival maybe?

We couldn't understand if this was a horror, comedy, or an audition for porno for the lovely leading ladies. That being said, the only thing they could do was take off their clothes as their acting skills left a LOT to be desired. Where did they find these girls?! In the back pages of a magazine me thinks.

How on earth this film got the green light for production, I have no idea. And we were so outraged by the sh*tness of the overall film, I signed up to IMDb just to warn others about not only wasting time watching this spaff, but actually destroying braincells by watching it.

How people have given this anything over 1* I don't know. I can only assume that there are a couple of 15yr old boys banging the bishop to the boobies.

So in short...I just died inside after watching this ..erm...'film'

(Oh, and the girl in the club bathroom changing her underwear 20 times???? WHY???)

DO NOT WASTE 1 SECOND OF YOUR PRECIOUS LIFE ON THIS FILM!!
Good to watch7/10
Muck is a classic gore/ slasher movie set with all lacing's of an 80's horror flick.Horror at its best! Or at its worst I must say. A great all round slash/ gore entertainment. 90 minutes of pure fright. Perfect for adults with a strong heart. Don't miss Gia Skova as Victoria Cougar in the movie.Steve Wolsh has done a great job of keeping the classic suspense/ horror combination. I love horror but Average story line; actually i could be better but lot of beauties thrown in including the lovely Gia. Over all good experience with movie "Muck" and my favorite Gia. i would also recommend to watch the movie and my rating is 7/10 for the movie and 10/10 for Gia
Different4/10
Well, that was ... different! Firstly I thought I'd missed the start of the film. It just jumps right in with a group of half naked, injured, young people staggering through a marsh in the dark outside the town of "West Craven" (get it?) to an empty holiday home seeking refuge. Only when you're a couple of minutes in do the title credits start to roll and you know it's supposed to be that way. Refuge from what? Well, mute, psychopathic, albino, half naked zombie "creepers" of course. That really just about does it for the storyline. I read it's a kick starter funded sequel to a former film that didn't get made (?) and it's got that feel about it. Some of the script lines also support that. The girls are attractive (several ex beauty queens) and they scream, run about and get naked and wet pleasantly often. The guys are, well, guys. All of them are expert in the do's and don'ts of horror films. Always go into the dark cellar; always leave any weapon you find behind; always, if you're a girl, get naked and take a shower in a strange house; never, ever, phone the police even when you eventually get a phone that works etc. etc. etc. Overall I'd say that, as it stands, it's an exercise in style over substance. The style, to be fair, isn't at all bad but the lack of substance really kills the entire effort. Written, produced and directed by newcomer Steve Wolsh, a sequel,"Muck: Feast of Saint Patrick", (It'll make more sense after you've seen this one) is already in the pipe for 2016. Unfortunately, the film ends just as abruptly as it starts. Steve actually makes a cameo appearance in an end credit scene that, you guessed it, bears no relation to anything in the movie. The end credits just come out of nowhere. Take an adequate B movie horror film, miss the opening 20 minutes and walk out 20 minutes before the end, and you've got "Muck". Checking on the net there's a level of background chaos that appears to go deeper than this film. A prequel that was never made, plans to release the first part in the trilogy after the second, and maybe even after the third. Different names given for the different films. Different answers given to people making enquiries. I'd be tempted to write the whole thing off as a shambles but ... there's something there. On the basis of watching Muck I'd say that, if Steve actually gets enough money to make an entire film, (with a beginning, a middle, and an end), it might, just might, be worth watching ... but this isn't it. My score 4/10, mostly for the girls. Steve, I envy you. It was probably way more enjoyable to make than to watch. If you ever make the sequel, or the prequel, or any movie, I'd still give it a watch.
What the heck....5/10
I'm not sure what the hell I just watched...but I liked it. It's hard to review, mainly because it's part of a larger story. (Or so they say). I'd recommend, but I do have two small issues: one, too much time is spent showing off the camera and what it could do, and two, enough with the women in various states of undress. In small doses you tend to expect it in these types of movies to be sure. Unfortunately the amount here is akin to Cinemax soft core porn.

I wish I could say more, but I honestly have no idea what I just watched.

I can't wait for the sequels!